15 Things That Give Us The “Ick” About A Guy—According To Our Readers

Sometimes serious things give us the ick, and sometimes it’s petty things. We asked our readers what gave them the ick, and their answers didn’t disappoint.

1. Being Rude to Waitstaff

Personally, this is my biggest ick. It takes more energy to be rude than to be kind, so it says a lot about a guy if he goes out of his way to be rude to waitstaff or other service workers like retail employees. It shows that he’s unkind and lacks empathy, and why would you want to date someone who isn’t kind to others? It doesn’t matter if he looks like Henry Cavill. Being rude to waitstaff is a major ick.

2. Talking About His Ex

Is there an appropriate time when you should have a conversation about some of your previous relationships? Of course, but it’s a red flag at best if he brings her up randomly. It can mean he’s not over her yet, has an unhealthy fixation on her, or treats women poorly in relationships. If he’s talking about his ex on the first date for no reason, take this as your cue to run as fast as you can.

3. Bad Hygiene

We all have days where we don’t feel like putting on a full face of makeup or washing our hair, but we should all put some effort into our appearance on a first date because first impressions are important. The way we take care of ourselves is also reflective of our values and how we view ourselves, so there’s nothing more unattractive than a guy who shows up with greasy hair and body odor on a date. If he didn’t take 20 minutes to clean up before meeting you, he likely doesn’t value you or your time (plus, it’s just gross, but that’s a lesser point).

4. Arrogance

There’s a difference between confidence and arrogance, but some guys seem to think they’re the same. The main difference is that a confident guy is humble and kind, while an arrogant guy is boastful and rude. Confidence is sexy, but arrogance is repulsive and immediately gives us the ick.

5. Not Opening Your Car Door

Chivalry is not only sexy, but it’s just showing good manners. It says a lot if a guy is willing to open your car door, the door of a restaurant, or pulls your chair out before dinner, and it says even more if he doesn’t. Chivalry is all about respecting women, so if he’s not chivalrous, well then…

6. When He’s Condescending 

There’s a reason why nobody likes the “but actually” guy. Nobody likes someone who is condescending, and it’s likely a good indicator of how he treats others. Similar to the guy who is rude to the waitstaff, this shows a type of arrogance that likely bleeds into the way he will treat you. Take this ick as a blessing in disguise because this guy is bad news.

7. Male Feminist

We’re not talking about guys who believe that women are equal to men because we’re all for that and if a man really believes that, he’ll show it through his actions. We’re talking about guys who go out of their way to brag that they're male feminists. If you’ve never experienced a guy who says he's a male feminist to cover up for creepy and/or sexist behavior, consider yourself one of the lucky ones.

8. Overly Touchy

There’s a time and place for physical touch and affection. Being overly touchy is not only creepy, but it shows that he likely doesn’t respect your boundaries or is only in it for sex. This is another ick that’s a blessing in disguise because any reason behind why he’s being overly touchy is bad news.

9. Porn Addiction

This is not only an ick, but a giant red flag. We can talk about the negative effects porn has on men, women, and relationships all day, but one of the main problems is that porn desensitizes us to graphic and violent sex. If he’s addicted to porn, he likely has unrealistic expectations when it comes to relationships and views sex above everything else, so it’s best to reconsider this guy.

10. Talks About Sex Immediately

This is more than ick – it’s a giant red flag. If he talks about sex on the first date (other than discussing boundaries) or immediately asks sexual questions when you first meet or match on a dating app, it’s clear that he wants sex over a relationship. Though we appreciate the honesty, run immediately when you meet this guy.

11. Smoking or Vaping

Aside from being harmful to his health, smoking and vaping is just…gross. It shows he doesn’t care about his health and those around him, and anyone who has kissed a guy after he’s smoked a cigarette or cigar knows how gross it is. He can be the hottest guy ever, but we all get the ick once he pulls out a cigarette or vape.

12. White Lies

We all tell a little white lie every once in a while but know not to make a habit of it. If he makes a habit of telling small lies, what does that say about him when it comes to bigger things? All it does is make you question what else he’s lying about, and then you’re down the Instagram rabbit hole wondering if he has a secret girlfriend or is a serial killer.

13. Vanity

It’s good to see a guy who takes care of himself, but a guy who’s obsessed with himself and how he looks screams vanity. None of us care about how expensive your watch is or how much time you spend on your hair every morning. We care about what kind of person you are. 

14. Wearing Flip-Flops

Is this one a little petty? Yes, but it’s also true. Nobody wants to see a man’s feet, and flip-flops are only acceptable to wear at the beach or pool. Be an adult and invest in a good pair of loafers.

15. Weird Laughs

Though some weird laughs can be endearing (especially when you know someone well), some laughs are just nails on a chalkboard. This is an ick that you can get over if you really like him, but we’d be lying to ourselves if we said that weird and obnoxious laughs weren’t turn-offs.

Closing Thoughts

From being rude to waiters to wearing flip-flops, plenty of things give us the ick. We can get over smaller ones, like having a weird laugh, but some icks, like porn addiction and obsessing over sex, are red flags, making it important to ask yourself why you’re getting the ick.

Don’t miss anything! Sign up for our weekly newsletter and get curated content weekly!