7 Body Language Tips To Use On A First Date That Show You’re Interested

You’re on a first date, and things are going brilliantly. You’re really connecting with one another, he’s made you laugh more than just a couple of times, and the conversation is flowing nicely. You’re feeling confident about how the date is going, until…

You realize you aren’t entirely sure what to do with your hands. Is it weird to keep them in your lap? Or should you fold them on the table? You try that for a few moments, before feeling like you look like a job interviewer. You’ve never felt so unsure of how to simply exist.

Body language is pretty powerful, so much so that we subconsciously use it to communicate the things we typically wouldn’t say out loud. So it’s safe to say that when it comes to first dates, the body language we use has the ability to make or break a budding romance. If we seem closed-off and disinterested through our body language, he’s unlikely to ask for a second date. If he perceives us as being engaged and attracted to him, however, he’s much more likely to ask to see us again.

So how can you use body language on your next date and save yourself from feeling like an awkward ragdoll? Here are seven of our best tips.

Maintain Eye Contact

They don’t say that the eyes are the window to the soul for no reason. Eye contact is one of the simplest ways to convey attraction, create connection, and feel more intimate with someone. Prolonged eye contact is said to release oxytocin, or what’s commonly referred to as the “love hormone.”

This doesn’t mean to stare into his eyes without breaking eye contact once – that would be a smidge on the creepy side. But this does mean that holding eye contact is the key to letting him know you’re into him. Even if you’re a little bit shy, try to hold his gaze as long as he holds yours. Use your intuition to know when it’s a good time to look away, but don’t let too long pass before you meet his gaze again.

Angle Your Body Toward Him

What’s the first thing you do when a guy you’re not interested in keeps trying to talk to you? You angle your body away from him, cutting him off physically from you and letting him know you aren’t open to continuing a conversation. You’re totally closed off.

So if you’re hoping to show a guy you aren’t just indifferent, but interested in him, do the opposite of that. Even if you’re walking next to him, angle your shoulders toward him while you talk. If you’re sitting, point your feet toward him as well. The point isn’t to awkwardly contort yourself, but to appear more engaged and responsive.

Use a Relaxed, Open Posture

It’s natural to feel a bit nervous on a first date, to fidget with your rings, or to cross your arms without noticing, or to hunch your shoulders. But all of these things indicate a lack of confidence, openness, and enthusiasm.

While you don’t want to appear too relaxed and end up looking like you don’t care, the goal is to strike a happy balance. If you have a difficult time not fidgeting with your hands, doing so slowly will appear more flirtatious and deliberate. Relax your shoulders and imagine a string coming from the top of your head to help give yourself better posture. Keep your arms by your side instead of crossing them or covering yourself with them. Walk with confidence and grace, with your head held high.

Lean In

We’ve all had an awkward moment when someone stepped into our personal space bubble, and we shuffled away to reclaim some distance – probably without even thinking. For the most part, we tend not to get too close to people we either don’t know well or aren’t attracted to. But when we like someone, we subconsciously want to be close to them, for our personal space and theirs to intermingle. 

Without going overboard, lean in toward him just a tad, whether you’re at a movie, sitting at a bar, or across from him at a cafe. Coming that little bit closer, breaking the personal space barrier ever so slightly, will let him know that the feeling is mutual.

Smile Warmly

Maybe you heard from a friend that to get a guy really interested, you have to play hard to get. And to do that, it was imperative that you act cooly, as if you could take him or leave him. While this approach might work for a few guys, what will really make a good impression is a genuine smile.

This certainly isn’t to say you should have a smile plastered on your face from start to finish. But offering your date a sweet, warm, genuine smile when it feels natural to you (and maybe even a hearty laugh) will help those sparks fly.

Touch His Arm

If body language can communicate a thousand words, touch can communicate a million. There’s no better, more efficient way to express attraction than through physical touch – even the lightest of touches can be more than enough.

The trick to making physical touch come across well and not fall flat or feel forced is to find a moment when it feels totally natural. For example, if your date makes a joke, reach out to touch his arm as you say, “You’re so funny!”

Play with Your Hair

While some men might prefer blondes, and others are all about brunettes, we’ve all heard it said time and time again that men love women’s hair. So why not subtly call attention to your own mane?

One simple way to show interest is by playing with your hair, which will indicate to him that you want to look your best. There’s certainly a fine line between the right amount of fiddling with your hair and going overboard (definitely don’t obsessively touch your hair all throughout the date), but giving your locks a twirl now and again will draw his attention to it and communicate your interest in him.

Closing Thoughts

Body language is meant to be subtle, to convey something you don’t want to say out loud, but still want your date to know. So instead of feeling overwhelmed at the thought of what to do with your hands the next time you’re on a date, try to enjoy letting your body language do some of the talking.

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