Are More Women Freezing Their Eggs Because There's A Lack Of Good Men To Marry?

The birth replacement rate is on the decline, and more people are dealing with infertility than ever before. Meanwhile, the trend of women choosing to freeze their eggs has been growing rapidly. While some have criticized this decision as being driven by selfish, career-driven women or dupes of the fertility industry, anthropologist Marcia C. Inhorn has found a different explanation. In her decade-long study of why women freeze their eggs, Inhorn found that it is actually men, not women, who are the problem.

Are More Women Freezing Their Eggs Because There's a Lack of Good Men To Marry?

According to Inhorn, one of the main reasons that women are choosing to freeze their eggs is the shortage of suitable men who are well-educated and prepared for fatherhood. Her research found that the women freezing their eggs tended to be successful high-earning professionals in their late 30s who were primarily single. They had been looking for a partner but were unable to find someone who is a good match. Apparently, this reflects the growing gap between men and women going into higher education, with more women than men now attending universities in the U.S. and Europe. This isn't exactly surprising, since women in the U.S. are much more likely to graduate from college, get a PhD, etc.

These women are seeking an egalitarian relationship and want to find someone with a similar level of education. “They were one after another women who had been successful in their career and at the same time had been looking for a partner, but they just couldn’t find that reproductive partner," Inhorn said.

However, she claims that men are often intimidated by the success of women, and some women even resort to toning down their educational achievements on their dating app profiles so they don't scare men away. Some men made jokes about the woman's education, which Inhorn categorized as "blatant kinds of misogyny and discrimination." Moreover, many of the men the women encountered in Inhorn’s study were reluctant to commit and unready for fatherhood, which was a priority for the women. This resulted in what Inhorn calls “reproductive waithood,” the state women are forced into by a lack of suitable male partners.

Inhorn interviewed 150 women who froze their eggs; 36 of them did it for medical reasons, and the rest chose to do it electively. Of course, the decision to freeze eggs is fraught with difficulties, not least of which is the cost. It is prohibitively expensive for most women, especially those who live in countries where it is not covered by the national health service or insurance. Moreover, clinics are adopting “aggressive” marketing tactics, knowingly heaping on extra costs to a treatment that can cost tens of thousands, and not taking enough care of patients’ physical and mental well-being.

Reading this article might make you believe that egg freezing is currently the best reproductive option for single women in their 30s—until society fixes men. According to Inhorn, we should be celebrating women's professional accomplishments, not punishing them for their success or allowing them to suffer because of men's supposed lack of progress.

It's reductive at best to claim that a lack of men is the reason why women are freezing their eggs in higher numbers than ever. Perhaps women are coming to terms with the idea that men aren't really interested in marrying a woman who prioritizes her career above all else. It goes against their biological desire to mate with a woman who will provide healthy children for him and nurture their home. Even if men aren't able to articulate this to themselves, they aren't intimidated by or scared of career-driven women—they simply aren't very attracted to them. That doesn't mean that women shouldn't be in the workforce, but rather that single women who want a family one day should present themselves to men primarily as potential wives and mothers, not as boss babes who are completely devoted to their job.

Our feminist culture encourages women to put off marriage and motherhood as long as possible. Focus on yourself! Have kids later! Unfortunately, many women are realizing that this is a losing strategy. Suddenly they're 35 years old and realize that many of the eligible men are looking for younger, more fertile women who have made it clear that family is more important to them than their career. These are all factors that play into women freezing their eggs. While there's no doubt that 30-something women may have trouble finding a husband, it's silly to claim that men are the largest driver behind so many women freezing their eggs.