How To ‘Drop The Hanky’ To Get Him To Make A Move

So there’s this guy – he’s handsome, charming, funny, and intriguing, and you have no doubt that you’d be an amazing match. You really like him, and you’re pretty certain he likes you too. The only problem? He just won’t make a move.

You’re not willing to walk away and forget about him, but you also aren’t willing to be the one to initiate more. You want him to make the first move, and you’re beginning to wonder if he needs some encouragement from you – if you need to “drop the hanky,” so to speak, to let him know that his interest would be reciprocated.

But how exactly do you do that while letting him be the one to initiate? How do you drop the hanky and get the guy to make his move?

Find Ways To Be Around Him

The most important thing to do when you’re trying to get it across to a guy that you’re interested in him? Find ways to be around him if you aren’t already in close proximity naturally so you’ll be on his radar regularly. If you work together or are already in the same friend group, you’re golden. But if not…

Go to community events or groups you have reason to believe he’ll be at, stop by his place of work if it feels natural to (like if he works at a cafe or a clothing store), or switch to the same church service he goes to – figure out other ways to be in close proximity with him that don't verge on stalker vibes.

Smile When You Catch His Eye (Bonus Points If You Do a Double-Take)

Most of us don’t like to be caught looking at someone. Our natural reaction to catching the eye of the guy we like is to look away quickly, maybe blush a little bit, and suddenly pretend to find the muffin on our plate incredibly interesting.

While it’s understandable to nervously dart your eyes away as soon as he catches you looking, if you really want him to know you’re into him, then hold his gaze for a few moments longer than you normally would, smile softly, and then look away slowly. If you really want him to get the message, do a double-take a few seconds later. If he does the same, he’s both into you and knows you like him, too.

Give Him a Compliment

So you’re having an enjoyable conversation with him, but you’ve already had a lot of those. You’re trying to think of a way to let him know you don’t see him like you see other guys – that you like him. What can you do to tip him off?

Give him a compliment. Tell him his hair looks nice today, or that shirt looks really good on him, or that he smells nice. Make it a compliment that you wouldn’t give to just anyone, but instead, one that hints at a deeper interest in him.

Take Interest in Him and Ask Questions

We all want to be interesting; we enjoy talking about ourselves, but especially when someone asks us to. And anyone who makes us feel interesting, we’ll immediately be all the more drawn to.

Nothing will set you apart from any other girl who might’ve caught his eye like taking interest in him and asking questions. He’s most likely used to being the one to show interest, so he’ll not only be intrigued by the change of pace, but want to keep the conversation going.

Find Something You Have in Common

We like what is familiar to us. That’s why we immediately get excited when we come across someone who’s from our hometown, or become fast friends with our coworker who’s reading the same book as us. We enjoy finding things we have in common, and instantly feel closer to someone with whom we share something.

So the next time you’re chatting with your crush, figure out something that you might have in common with him that you can bond over. This will make him feel more connected to you and give you something to talk about.

Create an Excuse To Give Him Your Number

In an ideal world, he’d ask for your number after you flash a smile at him and he strikes up a conversation with you, and the rest would be history. But sometimes, you need to find a way to give him your number and help things move along. But maybe you don’t just want to say, “Hey, here’s my number. Call me sometime.” So what do you do?

Create an excuse to give him your number. Maybe you “lost” your phone and you need him to call it, or maybe he’ll need your number just in case he needs someone to cover his shift, or offer him your number when you invite him to a group function so you can send him the info. While we’d all like for the guy we like to just ask for our number, it’s possible to help him along without coming on too strong.

Allow “Accidental” Touching

Even those of us who are relatively comfortable with physical touch would move away if we accidentally touched knees or someone’s arm or brushed hands – if we weren’t into them, that is.

So if you happen to come into close contact or actual physical contact, while you’d typically jerk away, allow your knees to continue touching, or your arms to keep on brushing against each other. He’ll immediately pick up on this and feel more comfortable making a move.

Don’t Play Games

We’ve all heard it said that you should wait double the amount of time to answer his text as it took him, or keep him guessing if you’re interested by turning down his invite to a group gathering, or mention a date you went on with another guy – all in order to play hard to get.

But if you really like a guy, it’s not a great idea to play around with his emotions. Putting him through silly games like this sets the relationship up for instability, could make him feel insecure with you, and might create resentment in the long run. If you’re lucky enough to find a guy you like, who likes you back, be mature and upfront with your feelings when he tries to make his move. 

Closing Thoughts

Some guys just need a little push when it comes to making the first move. Dropping the hanky by holding eye contact, giving him compliments, and giving him an excuse to text you will help move things along.

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