Is Your Feminine Archetype An Aphrodite Or A Demeter?

When I was a girl, I longed to be the heroine in a great story – or, honestly, even just in my own life. I loved to read the stories of heroines like Eowyn from The Lord of the Rings or Jo from Little Women – girls who faced trials with virtue and strength. But the model of a woman’s strength that our world presents is all too often that of the “girlboss.” Instead of finding strength in her femininity, we are told that women need to become like men in order to be heroic. It’s been easy, for me at least, to lose track of the real key to a woman’s heroic journey: her femininity. 

The truth is that a woman’s femininity provides her with all of the unique gifts she needs in order to become the heroine of her story. If we want to reclaim a true sense of feminine heroism, however, we need to look at different archetypes from the “girlboss” stereotypes that populate most of our media. Using the work of philosophers like Julius Evola, we can discern two primary archetypes of feminine strength that come from the unique gifts of a woman’s femininity: the nurturing Demeter type and the inspiring Aphrodite type.

The Demeter Type

The more common of the two archetypes is the Demeter type, named after the ancient Greek goddess of agriculture, the harvest, and fertility (also known as Ceres in Roman mythology). As goddess of the harvest, Demeter was considered the cause of all growing things and fertile soil. Appropriately for the goddess of growing things, Demeter was the devoted mother of Persephone.

A Demeter type thrives by acting with her maternal energy, and her primary focus is on the children in her life. She is the Madonna and housewife figure, and is happiest when she is cultivating a protective environment for her children. Demeter’s nurturing spirit is not restricted to her own children – she will take in sick or abandoned animals and dedicate her time to helping people in her community who are suffering.

The Demeter type is the heroine of her story by opening her home and heart to care for her children and those who are weak or suffering. Demeter types are especially attractive to most men, since their desire to create a nurturing environment matches a man’s desire to have a family to protect. 

To understand the weaknesses of a Demeter, we must look again to Greek mythology. In the mythology, Demeter’s daughter Persephone is abducted by Hades, god of the Underworld. Desperate to find her child, Demeter abandons the harvests to search for her daughter and the world turns cold and barren.

Thus, the Demeter type’s desire to nurture can be a two-edged sword. Without someone to care for, the Demeter type’s nurturing gifts can atrophy, and she will become cold and mournful like the goddess in the myth. On the other hand, when the Demeter type does have someone to nurture and care for, she can sometimes take her nurturing energy to the point of controlling the people she cares for, like the infamous “helicopter parent.” The Demeter type can only fulfill her heroic purpose when she finds a balance between these extremes to create a healthy environment for those she cares about.

Demeter Types: Elinor Dashwood from Sense and Sensibility, Meg March from Little Women, Maria Von Trapp from The Sound of Music

The Aphrodite Type

The other dominant feminine archetype is the Aphrodite, named after the Greek goddess of beauty and love (also known as Venus in Roman mythology). Less common than the Demeter type, the Aphrodite type’s energy is focused more on her romantic partner than on nurturing her children and community. The Aphrodite’s energy is often devoted to an exceptional man with whom she shares a great cause or mission.

The Aphrodite type is best fulfilled when she is providing constant support and a challenging voice that calls out the best in her partner. Her beauty will inspire him to achieve great things, but she will also be the wise countering voice that helps him find his way to greatness. Since this type thrives on new and exciting challenges, she will often avoid the repetitive nurturing tasks (such as laundry or dishes) that a Demeter type thrives on.

Just because the Aphrodite type’s energy is primarily channeled toward her romantic partner doesn’t mean she is barred from being a mother, however. Many Aphrodite types will still have children, and her laidback maternal energy will be well-suited to some children’s personalities.

It’s because the Aphrodite type’s influence over men is so strong that she can also prove dangerous both to them and to herself. If the Aphrodite type does not find a man who can rise to the challenge of her beauty and wisdom, her energy can become self-focused and narcissistic. Similarly, if the Aphrodite type does not have a type of excellence to strive toward, she can become hyper-focused on her partner to the point of obsession. It’s important for the Aphrodite type to strike a balance between the two and to find the right partner.

Aphrodite Types: Emma Wodehouse from Emma, Galadriel in The Lord of the Rings, Princess Buttercup from The Princess Bride.

Closing Thoughts

Thinkers like Julius Evola have pointed out two major archetypes of feminine strength: the way of Aphrodite and the way of Demeter. A Demeter will be primarily focused on channeling her energies into the well-being of her children, and the Aphrodite’s primary focus will be in inspiring the best in her male partner. While most women will have a strong tendency towards one or the other, ultimately the ability to act on both archetypes lies inside every woman.

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