Which Male Archetype Are You Most Attracted To?

We all have somewhat of a “type” – the kind of guy we’re typically attracted to. Some of us might like stoic, manly types like Henry Cavill, others might like a goofy, sweet type like Chris Pratt, and still others might go for a mysterious, artistic type like Sufjan Stevens. But normally, there’s a specific type of guy we tend to go for.

But did you know that aside from a guy falling into the brooding artist category or the silly and sweet category, there’s also such a thing as male archetypes, according to psychologist Robert Moore? Archetypes, not to be confused with personalities, describe different energies that a man can possess, as well as different patterns and behaviors, which will each serve different purposes. Moore’s four male archetypes are The Lover, The Warrior, The Magician, and The King.

This is where it gets even more interesting: Each male archetype can be broken down into three parts (illustrated in the shape of a triangle). One part is the most positive, highest expression of the archetype, and the two other parts (the bottom corners of the triangle) are referred to as the “shadows.”

Which archetype are you most attracted to?

The Lover

The Lover is sensual, but not merely in the way you might be thinking. Lovers are passionate, idealistic, intense, and youthful. He is marked by his desire for intimacy (of all kinds), his heightened empathy, and his ability to connect deeply with most people he comes across. He is also very in touch with his senses and thoroughly enjoys the pleasures of life.

The two “shadows” of The Lover are:

• The Addicted Lover: This Lover is described by Moore as “eternally restless.” He feels his feelings in the fullest sense – he falls in love quickly, and he wallows deeply when that love ends. He is addicted to the high that a new person, a new love, and a new experience bring.

• The Impotent Lover: This lover has been tossed about by life, and therefore, sees everything through a gray lens. He once had passion, but has since lost it, and feels shame when he indulges his buried desire for more.

Examples of The Lover (healthy and unhealthy): Lancelot, Jay from The Great Gatsby, Romeo from Romeo & Juliet, Edward Cullen from Twilight, Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother, Barry Berkman from Barry

The Warrior

The Warrior is known for being aggressive, loyal, decisive, and sometimes emotionally detached. He strongly desires to feel purpose, takes on responsibility, and is the man everyone looks to when a decision must be made. He is the definition of a “manly man.”

The two “shadows” of The Warrior are:

• The Sadist: This Warrior is so detached from his emotions that he has slipped into cruelty, even toward those weaker than him – in fact, he has a sort of disdain for weakness. The Sadist is often a workaholic.

• The Masochist: This Warrior is said to feel powerless; he is seen as a doormat and often allows others to abuse him. However, he is also very detached from his emotions and sees himself as a martyr.

Examples of The Warrior (healthy and unhealthy): Geralt from The Witcher, Mando from The Mandalorian, The Punisher from Daredevil, Bruce Wayne

The Magician

Moore says that “The Magician is the knower.” Color us intrigued. The Magician, Moore says, is a man who operates on another (higher) level from everyone else in the world. He is quite reflective, intelligent, reserved, enigmatic, and has an insatiable hunger for a sort of secret knowledge.

The two “shadows” of The Magician are:

• The Detached Manipulator: This Magician is on the cynical side. This leads him to use his intelligence to manipulate others. He is also prone to overthinking, which can cause him to fail to make decisions for fear of making the “wrong” one.

• The Innocent One: This Magician is infatuated with the idea of what being a Magician means – the notoriety, attention, and praise that it can bring him. But he loses this excitement when faced with the responsibility and work required of him to be a Magician in the fullest sense.

Examples of The Magician (healthy and unhealthy): Sherlock Holmes, Rick Sanchez from Rick and Morty, Kendall Roy from Succession, Loki, Walter White from Breaking Bad

The King

The King is considered the most important of the four archetypes. He is a mixture of the three others in perfect harmony, making him the epitome of masculinity. He is mature, decisive, protective, centered, and offers order and inspiration to those around him. Most importantly, he leaves a legacy behind.

The two “shadows” of The King are: 

• The Tyrant: This King does not inspire happiness or creativity in those near him. Instead, he is narcissistic, seeking out total and complete power. His pursuit of power can cause him to feel insecure when he feels he does not have enough.

• The Weakling: This King does not own his role. He instead abdicates his throne, shirks responsibility, and allows others to pick up his slack. However, the Weakling is often interwoven with the Tyrant – they are seen as two sides of the same coin.

Examples of The King (healthy and unhealthy): Aragorn from The Lord of the Rings, Superman, Logan Roy from Succession

Closing Thoughts

While people are complex and will often surprise you, it’s fun to think of which archetype most appeals to you – and which one your crush aligns with. Just make sure you’re focusing your attention on a man who expresses his archetype healthily!

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