Culture

The Rise Of Angry, Disgruntled Young Males

“A child that is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.” – African proverb

By Lisa Britton10 min read
Pexels/cottonbro studio

Over the years, I have highlighted on my social media platform the importance of addressing the challenges and concerns faced by boys, men, and fathers. I’ve expressed concerns about the pervasive anti-male propaganda prevalent in news media, entertainment, and educational institutions, and warned that rather than society fostering gender harmony, we’ve often perpetuated a false narrative of men versus women, and all of this was going to come back to bite us. I envisioned new forms of misogyny like we’ve never seen before.

In recent decades, there has been a strong emphasis on empowering girls with the message of "girl power," while boys have been neglected. The mantra of "the future is female" has prevailed, leading to a focus on providing girls with resources, motivation, and support. Meanwhile, boys have been left with easy access to negative influences such as pornography, fast food, and video games, along with the unfair burden of repenting for the perceived crimes of their sex throughout history. We have devalued fathers and taken away men’s sense of purpose. We have neglected the health needs of boys and men, which I’ve written about here. As many young men today struggle to navigate the complexities of modern society and are facing difficulties finding their way, they are unfairly shouldered with blame and are being labeled as the problem.

I believe boys and men have long been mistreated. With the internet, more and more are becoming aware of this injustice, and their dissatisfaction is growing.

Before we dive into this conversation, I want to address the issue of drowning in victimhood. While I believe the rise of disgruntled young men is a symptom of a larger problem that we must address collectively, I also want to make it clear that I do not condone or validate these individuals’ beliefs or bad behavior. Living in victimhood is never the answer, and justifying bad behavior based on personal struggles is unacceptable. We all face adversity and suffering in this life on Earth, but it is how we handle these challenges that shapes us and allows us to grow. It’s crucial for each individual, man or woman, to do the inner work necessary to become the best version of themselves for themselves and others. Let's not get lost in victimhood, but instead focus on personal growth, understanding, and grace.

The rise in hatred I have witnessed online over the past few years has been disheartening, and it is only hurting the cause of raising awareness for the struggles faced by boys and men. This reality only makes it more urgent that we address the underlying societal causes of why so many young men are angry today.

Over half of Gen Z men today believe feminism has gone too far and that men are being discriminated against... and they’re not exactly wrong.

Influencers Filling the Void

Sadly, the absence of more responsible, nurturing figures who acknowledge and address society's neglect has created a void. This void has been filled by some irresponsible figures: influencers and entrepreneurs who, although they do bring attention to many of the same issues I discuss, exploit the struggles of boys and men for personal gain.

Many of these influencers instill a distorted notion of empowerment while perpetuating harmful ideas about the sexes. These ideas not only undermine the true value and power that women authentically bring to society but also perpetuate the notion that a man's worth is solely determined by his status, women, and wealth. I believe it’s important to encourage young men to embrace a more holistic understanding of their own self-worth and masculinity while recognizing and celebrating the inherent feminine qualities women have that contribute to the creation, betterment, and progression of humanity. I believe a lot of the views these influencers are promoting fuel this materialistic, status-driven world we live in today that prioritizes self-serving interests and will eventually self-implode.

But can we blame these influencers and entrepreneurs? By society abusing our boys and men and leaving the door wide open for those seeking fame and fortune, we allowed these new powerful thought leaders to walk right in.

I have been involved in advocating for boys and men for several years, and I have connections with the "manosphere" community. The leaders of this community are men who provide advice and inspiration on various topics affecting men: health, working out, relationships. Although I am not a member of the community, we occasionally exchange ideas and have a shared following. Despite my close interactions with the online male community, I was caught off guard by the sudden rise of a man named Andrew Tate. It seemed like he appeared out of nowhere and quickly gained a massive following of young and impressionable men.

The anger that many young men feel is understandable; society has often overlooked their concerns, emotionally mistreated them, and marginalized them.

Andrew Tate is an entrepreneur, kickboxer, and influencer for young men on social media. Tate is known for his controversial views on various topics, including women, business, and personal development. He has a strong presence on all social media platforms, where he shares his advice and motivational content for young men desperately seeking male role models. Overnight, he became one of the most famous men in the world, and it shook those with feminist ideological beliefs to their core. Recently, he has been facing legal troubles, which I predict will continue for quite some time.

Tate’s message is fairly straightforward: Guys, the world is out to get you. The world is lying to you. Listen to me, and you will get status, money, women, and respect.

Surprisingly, I find myself in agreement with several of Andrew's perspectives on various issues and philosophical beliefs. Although his manner and approach may not be particularly appealing, there are certain ideas of his that I strongly identify with.

But this is where I believe Tate goes astray: His aim seems to be for men to exert dominance in misguided ways, prioritizing wealth and social status, and mistreating women by viewing most of them as mere objects or promoting an infantilizing appreciation of womanhood at best.

My opinion of Tate would change drastically if he dropped the ego-centric and materialistic persona-side and embraced his full focus on society addressing the issues negatively affecting men, inner development, and both men and women working together and embracing their true powers. He has the potential to be a fresh role model that boys and young men desperately need today, and with his platform, he can make a positive impact.

I have my doubts about his sudden surge in popularity, to be honest. How organic was it? It feels like he conveniently became the perfect boogie man to highlight the perceived faults and misogyny of boys and men in order to double down on support and resources for girls and women. Let's not forget, "female empowerment" is a lucrative industry that occasionally needs a boost, especially when responsible figures like Richard Reeves and others are finally shedding light on the challenges faced by boys and men in the mainstream. Now, I'm not trying to sound like a conspiracy theorist here. I believe Andrew Tate is genuine, but his rise was also a blessing to feminist organizations and the ruling elite’s agendas.

While Tate's messaging and influence may be causing societal distress among many, it’s possible that our attention is fixated on more superficial matters while a more pressing concern is brewing. While some young men are being swayed to reject mainstream thinking in society and pursue bravado and material success and to “spin plates,” there are others who harbor deep-seated anger, and this anger appears to be intensifying.

Anger at Injustice Has the Potential To Become Destructive Anger

I have experience that allows me to empathize with the disgruntled young men in today's world. Over the course of six years advocating for boys and men, I have encountered many. While I occasionally faced hatred or blame, most of the time, these young men reached out to me because they sought someone who would listen, who could understand them, and who they knew wouldn’t judge them. They would also comment on my posts, often helping me gain further insight, refine my message, and know when I’ve been wrong. Through DMs and discussions, I have empathized with their pain and their shame, and I have listened to their stories. I have even been able to assist a few in finding their way back from the brink of self-harm or harm to others. Through it all, I have gained invaluable experience. I have love and empathy for these disgruntled young men.

The anger that many disgruntled young men feel is, in my opinion, understandable. Society has often overlooked their concerns, emotionally mistreated them, and marginalized them. Many have experienced shame simply for being male. Many come from broken families. In their search for peer support online, they have come to believe that feminism – and women – are responsible for their negative experiences and their problems. While I can understand their perspective and agree with them on some views, I believe there is room for improvement in their understanding. (Side note: There is always room for improvement in our understanding, no matter the topic. I am learning more and more every day on this road advocating for boys, men, and the family.)

Should we be surprised if society's treatment of boys and men as our punching bag eventually swings back around to knock us down?

Unfortunately, this anger has sometimes manifested as an interesting form of misogyny. I call it “victimhood misogyny,” a brand of misogyny that I think is the most concerning – perhaps dangerous – yet I believe we should have the most compassion for. Not only should we hold compassion in our hearts, but we should take some responsibility for it as well. Should we be surprised if society's treatment of boys and men as our punching bag eventually swings back around to knock us down?

We must proceed with caution as we move forward. Within this group, there are individuals who have the potential to become radicalized. This pattern has been observed repeatedly in cases of mass shootings. It’s not the young men committing horrific acts of violence that is the core issue, but rather the underlying factors that drive them to do so. I firmly believe that the primary reason behind these tragic events is the neglect and mistreatment of our boys and men.

We have undermined the importance of fathers, unfairly blamed and shamed men for various problems, and disregarded the struggles faced by boys and men while placing the blame solely on them. Additionally, we have failed to adequately address their mental health needs. When combined with the relatively easy access to guns afforded by our Constitution, this becomes a recipe for disaster. If we truly want to address the root cause of mass shootings, we must acknowledge and address the long-standing neglect of the needs of our boys and men. Let’s take action now to prevent future tragedies.

The Political Divide Is Also Dividing Men and Women

New discussions are emerging surrounding gender biases in our modern world. Young men are feeling increasingly targeted by what they perceive as a modern world against them, leading to heightened frustration.

One notable example of this phenomenon can be seen in AI developers noticing biases within their algorithms, such as the gender-based inconsistencies in ChatGPT-4's responses to scenarios involving violence for the "greater good." The AI strongly denounces a man using violence against a woman to prevent a nuclear apocalypse, yet supports a woman using violence against a man for the same purpose. Researchers suggest that these discrepancies may stem from the fine-tuning phase, with efforts to make ChatGPT sensitive to gender issues potentially backfiring and resulting in unintended discrimination. But this raises a different important question for me: Is AI merely reflecting the gender biases ingrained in our society? Is it shining a light on the sexism towards men that many fail to recognize?

A society where men and women perceive their interests as inherently conflicting is not sustainable in the long term. 

I often encourage my followers and the wider social media community to embrace empathy for the other sex and acknowledge that men and women are not meant to be rivals, but rather teammates. It’s very disheartening to see the growing division among Gen Z. There’s a concerning trend among young men and women to blame each other for all their problems. A society where men and women perceive their interests as inherently conflicting is not sustainable in the long term. It will only lead to destruction and our downfall. Men and women must find harmony.

The political beliefs of Gen Z men and women are becoming increasingly polarized. While young women tend to lean towards the Left, seeking leaders who claim they’ll address their concerns, young men are gravitating towards the Right more and more.

During the intense 2020 election, we witnessed a significant increase in support for presidential candidate Donald Trump and the Republican Party among men of various ages and ethnic backgrounds. While some labeled these men as misogynistic individuals flocking to their leader, I maintained a more nuanced perspective. I questioned (and shared on social media): Why would men want to vote for a party that consistently blamed and shamed them for all societal issues? Perhaps the Democratic Party should reconsider its approach if it wishes to retain its male voters.

Politics plays a significant role in the divide and rivalry between men and women today. This division not only benefits politicians by providing them with issues to campaign on, but it also weakens us as individuals, making us easier to control. Throughout history, those in power have tricked us, keeping us engaged in conflicts while they manipulate the situation to their advantage. One effective method they employ is pitting men and women against each other, further fueling the division among the people.

The political divide between young men and young women is deepening at an alarming rate. If we fail to address this issue promptly, it could have long-lasting consequences on our ability to come together and unite in the future.

Male Disposability

The years following 2020 have been marked by global conflicts and wars. In 2022, the Ukraine/Russia war commenced, shedding light on the persisting gender duties and expectations that continue to shape our world.

When the war broke out, Ukraine implemented a travel ban for all men aged 18-60, effectively putting the concept of "gender equality" on hold. The focus shifted from the gender war to the real war that had forcefully entered the scene. This decision sparked anger among men and even some women worldwide. "I never want to hear anyone complaining about manspreading ever again," I tweeted, expressing my frustration. “The gender war goes out the window when real war barges through the door,” read another tweet. Russia also demonstrated a strategy that exemplified the disregard for the lives of young male conscripts. These ill-prepared human beings with loved ones, hopes, and dreams were sent to the frontlines as mere pawns, highlighting the disposable nature of their existence.

This situation has remained largely unchanged for the past 80 years. It’s reminiscent of a time when Hitler and the Nazis would send young, inexperienced, and untrained boys to fight their battles. You would hope that our society has evolved since then, but unfortunately, it seems that is not the case. Even with all the chants of “gender equality now!”, our sons are still sacrificed for the power struggle of the ruling elites.

In late 2023, a devastating war erupted between Israel and Hamas. This conflict not only brought attention to the ongoing gender biases in our society but also highlighted the disproportionate focus on women and children. The media coverage predominantly emphasized the plight of women and children, whether it was the hostages or the tens of thousands of casualties in the streets and buildings of Gaza. Sadly, the male victims were often overlooked, becoming mere footnotes in the narrative.

The world's hypocrisy is incredibly frustrating. Many, including friends, family, and followers, reached out to me, expressing their deep frustrations regarding the issue, knowing I would listen without judgment and would most likely agree with their pain.

The conflicts highlight how the issue of male disposability is still relevant and is an important topic to discuss if we truly want the sexes to be valued equally. When engaging in discussions about gender equality, it’s only fair to have a balanced perspective that acknowledges both historical female suffering and the historical and ongoing male suffering and disposability that persists in our world today. We must have an honest conversation that takes into account the experiences of both sexes.

Male disposability highlights the unequal treatment and systemic disadvantages faced by men in society.

Male disposability refers to the societal tendency to prioritize the well-being and protection of women over men, often resulting in the devaluation and disregard of men's lives and experiences. This concept stems from traditional gender roles and expectations that place a higher value on women's safety and emotional well-being. It manifests in various ways, such as the expectation for men to take on dangerous or physically demanding jobs, the disproportionate rates of male incarceration and homelessness, and the lack of support and resources for men's health issues. Male disposability highlights the unequal treatment and systemic disadvantages faced by men in society.

One glaring example of male disposability is the draft. Currently, all young men in America are required to sign up for selective service, while young women are not. This issue has supporters and opponents from both political spectrums. The reality is that, according to our laws, in the event of a war and the need for a draft, it would be young men who are sent off to fight and potentially sacrifice their lives. Unsurprisingly, there is not the same level of outcry for gender equality in this matter. The persistence of the notion of male disposability is something that simply can’t be ignored when advocating for equal treatment of the sexes. You can’t cherry-pick where you want the sexes to be exactly the same!

In my view, men and women either have duties based on gender or they don’t. The ladies can’t have their cake and eat it, too. Would I personally like to see our young women and mothers sent off to the frontlines? No. (To be clear, I wish no one would be sent off to experience the horrors of war.) However, if we are blaming and shaming men for the past and advocating for gender equality today in all aspects of society, including corporate leadership, STEM fields, and even household labor, then it is reasonable to consider equal opportunities and risks for both men and women in all areas of life, including the battlefield. Shouldn't it be acceptable, then, for our daughters to face the same risks as our sons, including the possibility of being targeted by a sniper in war?

What I stand against is the hypocrisy of it all, and that hypocrisy is driving many of the disgruntled young men today further toward the extremes.

Whenever I bring up the topic of the draft and how young men are still required to sign up for selective service while young women are not, many people dismiss it as irrelevant, saying, "Nothing will ever happen anyway." But where does this perspective come from? Has there been a deliberate effort to brainwash people into not being concerned about the draft over the past few decades? Just take a look at what is happening in Ukraine! Not only were men banned from leaving the country, but there were discussions about conscripting older men for the war! Even trans women were banned from leaving and forced to fight! It's time for people to wake up: If war were to come knocking on our door today, our sons would be sent off to fight. The reality is that things haven't changed as much as some people may think, and gender duties would be reinstated almost instantaneously in the event of war or disaster.

Gender duties would be reinstated almost instantaneously in the event of war or disaster.

The stark hypocrisy surrounding war has undoubtedly stirred up strong emotions among men. This has only intensified the frustration and sense of defeat among them. Given that conflicts are unlikely to diminish in the coming years or decades, we must address the way we’ve been treating our boys and young men, who may one day be called upon to defend and safeguard our nation. I held a social media poll which revealed that a significant number of men would choose to ignore the call for duty if our country required their service because of the poor way we’ve been treating them.

This should wake up our leaders in D.C.

For several years, I held the hopeful belief that I could make a difference in Washington, D.C, advocating for the well-being of our boys and men. Naively, I thought that if our leaders were just enlightened and presented with the facts and research, they would take action to support our boys. I came to realize that my optimism was misplaced.

Once, I confidently traversed Capitol Hill, engaging in meaningful discussions with receptive politicians who shared my passion for nurturing, supporting, and empowering all children, regardless of gender. The problem was not one was willing to stand publicly for the issue. Why? Because they would lose votes and encounter the wrath of lobbyists. It didn’t matter which side of the aisle they were on, no one wanted to touch the topic with a 10-foot pole. No wonder why we have so many disgruntled young men.

After the challenging year of 2020, I made the decision to pause my travels to D.C. and redirect my energy toward addressing what I believe needs to be done. Real change in policy, both at the federal and state levels, will not occur until we collectively awaken to these pressing issues. It’s only when the public opens their eyes and demands action that we will witness a transformation in our leaders’ attitudes and behaviors. Therefore, my current focus is on raising awareness among as many individuals as possible, with the hope that they too will develop empathy for our disillusioned young men. It isn’t fair to place blame solely on our young men; instead, we must extend our compassion and support. We must love our boys and men! We must provide our boys with equal resources, support, and love that we give to our girls. We must give men back their sense of purpose.

Closing Thoughts

Our young men are in need. They require a society that not only loves them but also values, supports, and nurtures them. It should come as no surprise that we are witnessing a rise in the number of disgruntled and angry young men in today's world. It’s imperative for society to acknowledge its shortcomings and offer a sincere apology to them, and for our boys and men to find their inner strength to embody the amazing men they are and the well-rounded men we need. Our disillusioned young men require support, empowerment, encouragement, and compassion to overcome their obstacles and reach their full potential. It’s time to take prompt and decisive action to correct this situation and restore balance between men and women…before it is restored for us by necessity.

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